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One Long Awkward Moment

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  • bananamlkshke@gmail.com

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I was all kinds of drunk when I wrote this and when I read it again a year later I decided it was too funny/sad/embarrassing/true not to keep. I mostly write at www.midyearresolution.blogspot.com these days.

"No, trust me. I know somebody, who knows somebody who knows all about it."

I'm totally awesome fyi. I'm 20 years old cougar in training (jk kinda) studying speech language pathology in Southern California. I'm pretty boring and highly neurotic, but if you're interested in reading about baby animals and sex dreams about nerdy guys I knew in high school, this is the ultimate journal. Most posts leave lingering questions over the status of my sobriety. I'm pretty much always simultaneously belligerent, overemotional, and slutty. I'm also single, so if you know of any nice guys send them my way. Bonus points if they're short and will probably be bald in ten years.

I'm also a prude, and curse like a sailor (or a semen!) which apparently throws some gusy off and makes them think I'm playing games. I don't know why this sounds like a personal ad. I'm drunk. v. v. sory.

8 simple rules, adam duritz, american psycho, anthropologie, arrested development, atreegrowsinbrooklyn, auntie mame, babyshambles, banana milk shakes, being a babe, being with adam duritz, ben folds, ben lee, bens, billiethevisionandthedancers, bob dylan, britney spears, cake, california, casablanca, clare bowditch, conan o'brien, cooking with adam duritz, counting crows, country music, cupcakes, cutting open cats, daffodils, damien rice, dawson's creek, democrats, dr. pepper, drop dead gorgeous, empire records, english accents, every fifteen minutes, flight of the concords, flowers, foreign films, foriegn men, freaks and geeks., gilmore girls, going to the movies, grounded for life, guidettes, guidos, guys with beards, hershey's kisses, himym, ina garten, indie pop, irina lazareanu, irish beach, j.crew, jack johnson, jane austen, jeffrey eugenides, josh & donna, josh and donna, josh lyman, josh turner, justin timberlake, karaoke, kate moss, king george iv, law and order, liberals, link crew, little roni, long car trips, love actually, mad about you, mallrats, me, mean girls, mendocino, monterey, morrissey, patrick bateman, persuasion, pete doherty, pride and prejudice, prince regent, reading, rosemont, sacramento, satc, saved!, seattle, secret agents, selena, selena quintanilla perez, sex, sex and the city, sleeping, sleeping with adam duritz, sorority life, speech therapy, speech-language pathology, stanley tucci, suze orman, tangerines, the bachelor, the barefoot contessa, the beach, the brunettes, the constant gardener, the departed, the dixie chicks, the fratellis, the kennedys, the libertines, the patty winters show, the pipettes, the sims, the virgin suicides, the west wing, traveling, tulips, uncle buck, undeclared, vietnamese food, weddings, yosemite